Lifestyle choices. We all lead different lifestyles. The strong bright ones make sure they are in control and they choose the lifestyle that suits them. The weak ones drift into something such as girls who get pregnant and then end up being a mother when they could have prevented it, or having to get married when they would have been better off staying single. A weak person once said to me that I was "lucky " that I had not become pregnant. I said "luck had nothing to do with it. It was thanks to the pill and condoms". The weak person then said "but what if you had forgotten to get condoms or the person you were with did not want to use them?" I said "I would not forget and I would not be that intimate with a person that irresponsible". He liked to think that whether or not one ends up pregnant is down to luck and chance. Just as he had ended up doing a job he hates and living with his parents at the age of 55 and liked to say that was all down to bad luck too. Many use the excuse of bad luck when they did not take control or make decisions or necessary changes or allow others to dictate to them. But a decision to do nothing and leave it to others to decide is making decisions too.
Months ago I came across a lady who was having a very difficult time of it. She had spent the whole of her life looking after two demanding and time consuming parents. In return she had a roof over her head. Towards the end she was nursing them and not able to go out. Then her father died and she was looking after her mother until she died too. She had no family or friends as her whole life had been that way. Now she had to get used to being alone all of the time as well as sorting out the house, finances, a nursing home for her mother, visiting her mother and getting a job. This also meant she had to get used to being out of the house and meeting people. A lot of people in her situation would have sat around crying and feeling sorry for themselves but she got on with it. She has problems but she sorts them or tries to cope with them the best she can. Many women often get very emotional and talk constantly about their problems when it would be more fruitful to spend that time sifting through their various options and making decisions or implementing improvements and changes so that things got better and there was less or no problems.
Are you better suited to being single, living with friends or living with a partner? Are you suited to being a parent? Do you like a lot of space where you spend a lot of time alone or do you crave company? Do you like to stay in or go out a lot? Do you need wise professional guidance on the best choice for you? Do you have the support you need right now? Some others are far better off and more suited to living alone whilst others are far more suited to being in a house share or with a loving partner. One woman I know is quite happy for her husban to be away a lot and prefers to be alone a lot but looks forward to seeing her partner again when he returns. Another lady I know is quite happy to be married but most of it is about enjoying being part of a large and close family, bringing up the children, more than about being a wife or partner to another adult. Blackboard centre
More free help. Lifestyle choices.