Addicted to my Computer


From the moment I get up in the morning I am glued to my computer screen all day except for when I reluctantly go to wash and get dressed (which I often do not bother to do) or have to deal with the postman, go to the toilet or eat.   I make sure I have ready meals and sandwiches in the fridge so that I do not waste valuable time preparing them or washing up.  The problem is that I am running out of money so how do I get some so I can pay my bills? Need guidance please advice columnist.



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Fancy my Friend's Husband


He is the most gorgeous man you have ever seen and quite honestly I do not know why he is with my friend as she is so fat and ugly.   He has smiled at me a few times and he even winked at me once over a joke and I sensed he feels the same way about me.  But how can I tell him that I want him and how do I get him to leave my friend to be with me?  I am very lonely and hate living on my own and he would be the perfect man for me.  I wrote him letters of love but he sent no replies. Please advise me Mr or Mrs advice columnist.


Desperate to get Laid


None of the women I have met have ever wanted to kiss me, cuddle  me or do anything sexual with me and it is really getting me down and making me very frustrated.  Have no idea why they are like this maybe they are all frigid or lesbians but yesterday I said to a woman who was standing in front of me in the suipermarket that I need the best sex urgently and asked her to suck me off and she refused. What is wrong with women and how can I get what I want? Please send me replies to my letters agony aunt.




My Friend has Bad Breath


This is such a tricky one.  My friend Caroline is a nice girl but despite being clean in every other way and always changing her clothing daily her breath smells awful. Sometimes she sits next to me and it wafts in my direction or she wants to give me a quick hug as she leaves me or a kiss on the cheek and I hate to tell her why I pull away.  Nobody else has said anything to me about it but she needs to know, so please advise me on how can I tell her?  Agony aunt please please help me.


Scared he Will Invade my Space


Am a widow of sixty and love living alone and having plenty of time on my own.  I hate it when I have to be with people for a long time and prefer them in small doses.  Now a friend has split up with her partner and expects me to let her move in with me and share my apartment with me. She is a nice person but I do not want anyone hanging around me every day or sharing my space. Please advise how do I deal with this in a way she does not take as funny?

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Long to go on a World Cruise


The snag is that I do not have money.  I do not work and live with mum. She lets me live here free because  but I do help her around the house a bit with vacuuming and dusting and cooking.  My cousin is off on this World cruise. it costs £5,540 and I want to go with him.  How do I ask mother to pay?  Surely she would understand that I need this holiday to escape all of my stresses?    Please give me guidance that I need an advice columnist to guide me and give me advice.