Find a Good Man

Find a good man.  Most women can easily get one but finding one that is good and actually worth the bother is quite another thing.  Then there is the fact that the sort that suits one woman might not suit another even though he is decent and genuine.  Since I have been single I have often come across single men who have no other romance in their life and no children and like to assume that simply because they are single and would not be cheating that must mean they are good enough and I must want them..... and the facts that we have nothing in common or that they are unemployed and unemployable, boring, selfish, violent, skint, have a history of drinking or takings drugs, have a personality disorder or are very needy do not matter!  Yes, being totally single is a must, but that does not mean that nothing else matters and that makes up for everything being missing.  Even when the two people have a great deal in common it is hard to make the relationship last so why bother to try when you have nothing in common and the other person is not your type?  It would either go wrong or be full of compromises and disappointments.

 

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Men often have a different check list to us when when seeking a lover or a partner.  The first question many men ask you online is what you look like.  The first thing they seek out on a dating agency profile is what you look like or your photo.  Things like the fact that you are hard working do not really matter to them and many of them would be happy to date a total idiot who is lazy and irresponsible if she is good looking.  So they want us to be the same and date a man who is empty headed and lazy if it suits him!  But the only way most women would bother with such a man is if she was on a desert island and very lonely and he was the only man there.

 

You need a check list of the five most important qualities or attributes you are seeking in a man. That might mean looks,  youth, fitness and health, decent job and car.    Always make sure that the guy has these things to offer before you "waste" time on him.  If looks a very importtant to you then do not bother with the ugly ones.  If you only like guys who have brown eyes fine, then do not go out with guys with green eyes.  There is nothing wrong with going online to find him and it it is easier in a way to ask questions before meeting then.  If looks are vital make sure you get a RECENT full face photo straight away.  One lady I know went on a dating site and put her profile and then had a guy who lived in another country respond.  It had never occurred to this (silly) guy that there was no point unless he was seriously thinking of emigrating.  He saw no harm in them chatting away and sending photos when he had no intentions of emigrating but to her it would have been a total waste of her time.  He told her that distance did not matter but she was not interested in any sort of relationship with a guy where they never or rarely met or she was expected to travel such a long way to meet. So she made this clear on her profile to stop further timewasters contacting her.

 

Remember that the more YOU have to offer the more you can expect in return but it would be a bit silly to insist he has a good job if you are unemployed, silly and unfair.  If you really do have a lot to offer then you can make your list longer to match what you offer. But if you are old, poor and ordinary do not say he must be handsome, rich and special, it will never happen.  Now ask yourself where you will find such a guy.   If you are unemployed or lazy or in a very ordinary and badly paid job you will not get anyone who is industrious and accomplished.  Opposites only attract when the opposites are things which are positive or at last neutral.  A tall person might be very happy with a short person but a rich person will not see any merit in a poor person.  If you want a guy who is very fit and active he will not be sitting in the library reading books all day. 

 

By being realistic, fair and patient you will end up with your good man, just be sensible and give it time.  

 

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